I Share Blood With A Rock God
by Geekdirectioner
Summary: It has always been my dream to meet the band Arsenal. I mean, I'm named after that band. Now's my chance. I've signed up to be a new keyboarder for Arsenal, and I got hired for the job. I get to tour with Arsenal everywhere with my friends, Drew and Sherrie, and little do I know, my life will be changed forever, and I will learn who my real dad is.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter #1: A New Job

" Arsenal, turn that down!" my mother shouted from the bottom of the stairs. I rolled my eyes and turned the volume to medium. I couldn't help that my favorite band was Van Halen and I liked rock n roll. Maybe I should tell you about myself.

My name is Arsenal, like the famous rock band. I think that's what my parents named me after. I only have my mom. My mom and dad had gotten into a fight when I was a baby (which was sometime in the 70s), and my dad left my mom. I have no idea who he is, since my mom doesn't talk about him a lot. My mom looks like me in only two ways. We have the same voice and personality. She said I was an exact replica of my father.

So anyways, I was sitting up in my room, listening to loud music, and flicking through a magazine. I heard a knock on my bedroom door. "Yeah!" I yelled over my music. The door opened and my mom stood there. She sat down on the bed and stroked my hair.

" Hey honey. Are you still looking for a job?" my mom asked. I looked at her carefully.

" Yeah, but you know I want to go into the music industry," I sighed. She smiled.

" Well, they have a job opening for a band, they need someone who can play the keyboard." She said. " I recommended you."

"Which band?" I asked. " AC/DC? Van Halen? Poison? Arsenal? Tell me!"

" It's Arsenal," my mom smiled. I gave out a little shriek. Stacee Jaxx was in that band, and he was my idol. Even though he drank a lot and had sex a lot, he still had lots of good songs. I had always dreamed of working with him. " Where do I go to file for a job?" I asked.

" The Bourbon Room." I loved that place. It was one of my favorite places to be, since my mom and I lived in Hollywood. My friends Drew and Sherrie worked there. They had even met Stacee Jaxx! I never got to see him at the Bourbon Room, though, because I was at a AC/DC concert (I had bought a ticket and reserved it for a year). I got up and turned off my record player.

" I'm going to the Bourbon Room!" I said, running out of my room.

" Good luck!" my mom said as I ran out the front door. I walked down the street and began to sing one of my favorite songs.

_I come home in the morning light,_

_my mother says "when you gonna live your life right?"_

_oh, mother dear, we're not the fortunate ones_

_and girls, they wanna have fun_

_oh girls, just wanna have fun_

I was halfway to the Bourbon.

_The phone rings in the middle of the night, my father yells "What you gonna do with your life?"_

_Oh, daddy dear, you know you're still number one_

_but girls, they wanna have fun,_

_that's what they really want, some fun, when the working day is done oh girls they wanna have fun_

Some of the teenage girls around my age joined me.

_girls they want, wanna have fun, girls wanna have..._

I saw the Bourbon in my vision. I jumped up onto a light pole and looked at the bright blue sky.

_Some boys take a beautiful girl and hide her away from the rest of the world_

_I wanna be the one to walk in the sun_

_Oh, girls_

_Just wanna have, that's all they really want_

_Some fun.._

_When the working day is done Oh, girls, They wanna have fun, Oh girls, Just wanna have fun..._

I jumped down and ran down the street, getting closer to the Bourbon with each step.

_Girls, they want, wanna have fun, girls, wanna have._

_They just wanna, they just wanna.._

_They just wanna, Oh, They just wanna, girls just wanna have fun, oh_

_Girls just wanna have fun, they just wanna, they just wanna, they just wanna, they just wanna, oh_

_They just wanna, girls just wanna have fun, girls just wanna have fun_

_When the working day is done, Oh, when the working day is done, oh girls, girls, just wanna have fun_

I was at the doors, ready to enter. I saw a man in the window, staring down at me curiously.

_They just wanna, they just wanna, they just wanna, They just wanna have fun_

_Girls just wanna have fun, they just wanna, they just wanna, they just wanna, they just wanna, have fun_

_They just wanna, girls just wanna have fun, they just wanna, oh girls, wanna have fun, girls just wanna have fun_

_When the workin, when the workin day is done, oh, when the working day is done, oh, girls, girls just wanna have fun_

_They just wanna, they just wanna, oh girls, They just wanna, have fun, Oh girls...girls just wanna have fun_

That song could be a description of me. I just wanna have fun and live my life while I still have it. I entered through the front door and made my way over to the bar. It wasn't too jammed packed today. Lonny and Dennis were behind the bar. " LONNY!" I yelled. He turned.

" Hey Arsenal," he replied.

" Mom told me that Arsenal were having job openings and the forms were here!" I said.

" You're lucky I saved this form for you," Dennis said, handing me a piece of paper and pen.

" Thanks Dennis!" I sat down on a bar stool and began writing down my information. _Name: **Arsenal Jackson **Age: **17 **Birth date: **May 9th **Eye Color: **Blue- green **Hair Color: **Dark Brown **Any criminal records: **None **Job: **Keyboarder **Gender: **female **Height: **5'5 **Weight: **110 lbs. **Talent(s): **Song-writing, singing, dancing **Disorder(s): **Anxiety, Depression, Bulimia **Parents: **Madison Jackson, father unknown **_

Even though I didn't get some of the questions, I still answered them honestly. " Where do I turn in the form?" I asked.

" Just hand it back in," Lonny said. Lonny looked over the form and frowned. " It's not getting better, is it?" he asked. I knew he meant my disorders. " Not really," I replied.

" It will. You can get through it. Promise," he said. I smiled slightly. Lonny was always the dad that I'd never got to have. Dennis took the form up to his and Lonny's office.

" You know what's funny," Lonny said, trying to change the subject.

" What?" I asked.

" You look A LOT like Stacee Jaxx."

" Why does everyone say that? That's impossible," I sighed.

" You don't know that," Lonny said.

" How's Drew and Sherrie been?"

" They've been good. They were waiting for you to fill out a form. They recommended you to Stacee," Lonny answered.

" Are they here?" Lonny opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by hearing voices upstairs.

" ARSENAL!" someone yelled. I turned around and saw Sherrie.

" SHERRIE!" I yelled back. We hugged each other.

" How have you been? I haven't seen you for months! How's touring been?" I asked question after question.

" It's been great! They're looking over your form in Dennis's office. I think you might get to tour with Drew and me!" It felt like fireworks were exploding in my chest.

" Come on!" Sherrie grabbed my hand and dragged me to Dennis's office. " What's it like being on tour with Stacee Jaxx?" I asked as she pulled me along.

" He seems a bit different, after, you know, Constance died during child birth and their baby died afterward..." Sherrie trailed off. I sighed. I always liked Constance with Stacee. She seemed pretty cool from what Sherrie told me about her. We reached Dennis's office and Sherrie opened the door.

" DREW!" I said/yelled. Drew turned around and smiled.

" Hey Arsenal!" Drew replied, giving me a hug.

" Arsenal?" a cool voice asked from behind Drew. I looked over his should and saw a man. He had a fur coat with a cowboy hat and sunglasses, and slightly tight black leather jeans. He had no shirt. I gasped. It was the one and only Stacee Jaxx! I pulled from Drew and I's hug.

" That's my name," I replied. Stacee just kind of stared at me for a moment or two. " Nice name," he finally said.

" Thanks. My parents named me after your band," I replied. Sherrie gave an awkward cough. " Stacee, this is the girl we recommended to you. Arsenal Jackson?" Sherrie said, signaling to me.

" Oh, right," he said. He picked up the form I had filled out just minutes ago. He looked over it long and hard. " 'father unknown'? " Stacee asked.

I sighed. " I don't know who he is. My mom never told me." He gave a 'hmph' sound and said," Interesting."

A monkey came out from under Dennis's desk. He ran over to me and flung itself onto my leg. " What the-?" I began. Stacee Jaxx looked down and saw the monkey on my leg.

" Hey Man," he sighed.

" Hey Man what?" I asked.

" That's the monkey's name," Drew explained. I nodded.

Hey Man wouldn't get off of my leg. Even when Stacee beckoned him away, he wouldn't do it. He and I ignored the situation.

" Ok, a keyboarder and singer. How do I know you can actually do those things?" Stacee asked.

" Do you want me to show you?" I asked. He nodded slightly. I headed down the steps slowly, since Hey Man was still stuck to my leg. I reached the main stage and walked over to the keyboard after pulling up a chair. I looked at the small crowd of people and gulped. I had always had stage fright. The crowd was of Dennis, Lonny, Sherrie, Drew, and Stacee.

" Any requests?" I asked.

" Don't stop believin'!" Drew said. I smiled. One of my favorite songs. I cleared my throat and began playing on the keyboard.

_Just a small town girl, livin in a lonely world._

_She took the midnight train going anywhere._

_Just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit, he took the midnight train going anywhere..._

Drew had come up on stage to play the air guitar.

_A singer in a smoky room, the smell of wine and cheap perfume._

_For a smile they can share the night it goes on and on and on and on_

Stacee glanced at me, probably surprised by how well at singing I was. Lonny just smiled. He had NEVER heard my voice before now.

_Strangers waiting, up and down the boulevard._

_Their shadows searching in the night_

_Streetlights, people_

_Livin just to find emotion _

_Hidin', somewhere in the night_

_Workin hard to get my fill_

_Everybody wants a thrill_

_Payin anything to roll the dice_

_Just one more time_

_Some will win, some will lose, some were born to sing the blues_

_Oh, the movie never ends_

_It goes on and on and on and on_

_Strangers waiting, up and down the boulevard_

_Their shadows searching in the night_

_Streetlights, people_

_Livin' just to find emotion_

_Hidin somewhere in the night_

We finally reached my favorite part.

_Don't stop believin'_

_hold onto that feelin'_

_Streetlights, people_

_Don't stop believin' _

_hold on_

_streetlights, people_

_don't stop believing, hold onto that feeling_

_streetlights, people..._

I heard clapping, even Hey Man was clapping, who was still stuck to my leg. I gave Drew a high-five and said," Thanks for helping me out a bit."

He just smiled. Stacee came up on stage, smiling. " You're hired," he said, shaking my hand. My eyes went wide. " You're not joking, right?" I asked. He laughed.

" No. I heard you from outside too, you know." He must've been the man I saw in the window.

But, HE WAS SERIOUS! I was a roadie now! And with the band, Arsenal! Hey Man released my leg. " I guess Hey Man wanted you to join us," Sherrie said. I smiled.

" When do we like, leave or when do I start?" I asked.

" The tour starts tomorrow. We'll be by tomorrow at 12 p.m. ," Drew said. I knew he'd show Stacee where to go. Drew used to always come over to my house. He's known me for a while now. My mom used to have him babysit me and he'd come over for dinner sometimes. He's was like the brother I never had.

" I gotta go and tell mom!" I said hopping up quickly and jumping off the stage. I ran from the Bourbon after saying," See you tomorrow!"

I went down the street and went ahead and sang again. I need to express my happiness and love for rock!

_I saw him standing there my the record machine_

_I knew he must've been about seventeen_

_The beat was going strong_

_Playing my favorite song_

_And I could tell it wouldn't be long before he was with me, yeah me_

_And I could tell it wouldn't be long before he was with me, yeah me_

I wasn't aware of Hey Man following me.

_Singing, I love rock n roll_

_so put another dime in the jukebox, baby_

_I love rock n roll_

_so come and take your time and dance with me, OW!_

I jumped up into the air and kicked my leg out like a true rock fan would.

_He smiled, so I got up and asked for his name_

_But that don't matter, he said, cause it's all the same_

_He said Can I take you home Where we can be alone?_

_And next we were moving on, he was with me, yeah me_

_Next we were moving on, he was with me, yeah me_

_Singing, I love rock n roll_

_so put another dime in the jukebox, baby_

_I love rock n roll_

_so come and take your time and dance with me, OW!_

I was home now, so I stopped singing. I noticed Hey Man sitting on the door step. " Hey Man! You need to go back to The Bourbon Room!" I said, bending down to his level. I noticed he had a note stuck to him. I got it and read it:

_Arsenal-_

_Welcome to the crew._

_-Stacee Jaxx_

I smiled. " That's why you followed me, then," I said. I found a pen in my shoulder bag that I had been carrying and wrote on the back of it:

_Thanks. I can't wait to start._

_-Arsenal_

I taped the note to Hey Man's leather jacket and he ran off down the street. I stood up and ran into the house.

" MOM!" I yelled. I heard a pan drop.

" ARSENAL!" my mom yelled, irritation apparent in her voice. "WHAT?"

I ran into the kitchen and saw mom holding her foot. " Oh, sorry. BUT GUESS WHAT?" I said. She looked at me expectantly.

" I GET TO TOUR WITH ARSENAL AS THEIR KEYBOARDER!" Her eyes went wide.

" Are you serious?" she asked. I nodded. She hopped over to me and hugged me. " That's great, honey! When do you start?" she asked.

" They'll be stopping by tomorrow at noon!" Mom paled slightly and sat down. " Mom, what's wrong?" I asked.

" Nothing, it's just, I won't be here. I'm, um, going grocery shopping," she replied. I raised a brow, but shrugged it off.

" Oh, I wish you could be here! You could meet Stacee Jaxx!"

"Yeah..." she mumbled. She looked up and smiled. " You should get to packing."

I nodded and ran up to my room. I grabbed my small suitcase. I put all of my best clothes into my suitcase and a few pieces of jewelry. I knew Sherrie would want to take me shopping for clothes while on tour, so I didn't pack my whole closet. I put all of my records (about 10 in all) on top of my clothes and all of my cassette tapes into the top pocket along with my cassette player and headphones.

I put on my black bangle bracelets and silver ring. I was already wearing my dagger(knife) necklace and premium red guitar pick necklace. My mom said they belonged to my dad. I placed my keyboard into its case and set on top of the suitcase.

I set my stuff by the door and began packing a shoulder bag. I put things like my hair brush, perfume, toothbrush, etc. into it. I began to wonder about my mom. I knew she didn't have to go to the grocery store tomorrow. I just went a few days ago. Why was she lying to me?

I plopped down on my bed and stared at my Arsenal poster on the ceiling. I never thought I'd get to be a roadie with them. I couldn't wait until tomorrow.

A simple dream had turned real.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter #2: Calls and Cut

I woke up this morning with a start. I peeled open my eyes and sunlight filled my vision. My alarm clock read _10:30 a.m. . _I pulled my blankets back and went over to my closet. I pulled on some black tights with a denim skirt over them, and an Iron Maiden shirt over my black tank, with my favorite red converse. I still had on my father's jewelry.

I stumbled down to the kitchen to get something to eat. I got a bowl of Wheaties and sat down. My mom had already left, since she had a note on the table for me. She said she would miss me and that she would send me letters all the time. I'd miss her. It seemed way too quiet in the house.

Once I finished eating, I went into the living room and got into my mom's old records. I found the Arsenal record she owned and placed it onto the record player. It began playing 'Wanted Dead or Alive'. I jammed out to it as I finished getting my stuff together.

The record soon ran out of songs to play in about an hour, so I changed it to Van Halen. I turned the volume up so it was pretty loud. I began dancing around the house a bit, and I forgot that it was nearly noon. I soon heard a knock on the door and then Drew yell," ARSENAL! TURN THAT MUSIC DOWN!"

I replied my saying," YOU'RE TOO OLD IF IT'S TOO LOUD!"

I turned it down anyways and shut off the record player. I walked down the hall to the front door and opened it. Stacee, Drew, and Sherrie stood there. I stepped aside to let them inside. They came in and Stacee looked at my old childhood pictures.

" Ok, need help getting your stuff?" Sherrie asked.

" No, but you can come help if you want. I don't care," I replied.

" Hey Arsenal, where's Madison?" Drew asked. Stacee snapped his head up.

" Oh, mom? She went grocery shopping or something. She's been acting really weird lately..." I said. Stacee began looking at a picture of my mom.

Sherrie and I headed up to my room. We entered and she looked at my room. "Nice room," she mumbled.

" Thanks," I replied, picking up my bag and slinging it over my shoulder. I put my keyboard on top of my suitcase. I saw someone out of the corner of my eye. I looked up and saw Stacee. He signaled to me, asking if he could come in. I nodded and he came in and sat at my desk. I looked on top of my dresser and saw a picture of my mom. It was torn in half, and looked as if someone was standing by her. She told me my dad was standing by her in that picture.

I knew she really didn't want me to know who my dad was, but I did. I had the right to know and she never told me. I grabbed a few pictures from the dresser and put them in my bag. I couldn't leave them behind.

I was done and Sherrie asked," Why don't you have any pictures of your dad?"

I shrugged. " My mom has them hidden away somewhere and he left when I was just a baby. I never knew him and I never got experience what it's like to have a dad. It's always been my mom and I."

Stacee looked guilty for some reason. " But don't you wonder who he is? Have you ever tried to find him?"

" I wonder who he is every day. I tried to find him, but I lost hope. It wasn't fun to grow up without a dad. I mean, I got to watch all my friends with their dads and stuff." It reminded me of the time I went to the father-daughter dance. I was the only one there without a dad.

Sherrie frowned and hugged me. " Sorry," she said. I shrugged. " At least I had my mom."

Sherrie let go. " You ready?" she said.

" Yup," I replied. We headed down the stairs after Stacee. I left a quick note for my mom and we headed out the door. There was a HUGE tour bus outside by my house. I locked up and Drew guided me over to the entrance of the bus. I went up the steps and looked around. There was a living room, kitchen, everything. I had never been on a tour bus, so it was a pretty cool experience. Sherrie grabbed my hand. " I'll show you to your bunk."

She led me down a short hall with two doors. " We get our own room, since we are girls," Sherrie said. I nodded. She opened the door and I saw two bunks on the right hand side, a closet on the left, and a small washroom straight forward. Two dressers sat near the bunks. It was cool. " I finally won't be alone in here all the time!" Sherrie said. " You get the bottom bunk."

I noticed Sherrie had posters hanging up around the room. They were all of our favorite bands. It _was_ 1987, after all. I sat down on the bottom bunk and began hanging up my old photos and a few posters. " Do you want me to help unpack your clothes?"

" Sure. I didn't pack a lot."

" Smart girl. You knew we'd go shopping together!" Sherrie smiled. I put my keyboard over by the window, near the record player. Sherrie handed me my records and cassette tapes, player and headphones, and I det them on the shelf beneath the record player. I finally got settled in, and the bus had already left. " Where are we first preforming at?" I asked.

" Las Vegas." That was 4 hours and 4 minutes from Hollywood. " Are we preforming there on Saturday?" I asked. Today was Thursday. " Yup," Sherrie replied.

We headed out to the living room after I got my cassette tapes and player. I guess the rest of Arsenal was on a different bus or something, because they weren't on the bus. I sat down by Hey Man and Stacee Jaxx. Sherrie sat on Drew's lap.

I was zoned out, listening to Iron Maiden. I couldn't stop thinking about my mom. She was hiding something from me. What was it though? Did it have to do with my dad? God, why did people never tell me what's going on? I guess my face looked screwed up, because Drew said," Arsenal's thinking again."

I looked at him and took off my headphones. " Hey! Shut up!" I rolled my eyes.

" It's funny because that's what Stacee does when he's thinking..." Drew trailed off. I raised an eyebrow. Could THE Stacee Jaxx be my...? No! That's impossible...isn't it? I'd have to talk to either Stacee or my mom.

Stacee glanced over at me. I glanced over at him. Was it possible that he was my dad? He would've been 17 when I was born...my mom was 17 when I was born, too...

I didn't really know. I just couldn't seem to think that it was possible. There were so many possibilities of who it could be. But, most of the signs were pointing towards Stacee Jaxx. I ignored the situation, though.

I pulled out my notebook from my bag. I felt like writing some songs. I had been working on one that I based off of my father. So far, it went:

_I should have known better_

_Than to let you go alone,_

_It's times like these_

_I can't make it on my own_

_Wasted days, and sleepless nights_

_And I can't wait to see you again..._

It was all true. I believe that it's my fault my dad left my mom, and that I shouldn't have let him go alone. But, sometimes, I can't make it on my own. I needed a father and I never got one. I spent many days and sleepless nights wondering who my father was. AND, I couldn't wait to see him again. I didn't know when I would see him, but I was determined to.

Stacee Jaxx looked over my shoulder at my songs. " Are those songs?" Stacee asked. I nodded.

" Oh, she writes lots of songs. I mean, she has notebooks full of them," Sherrie said.

" Sherrie!" I said under my breath, but loud enough for her to hear.

" Oh really? Can I see them?" Stacee asked.

"Uh-" I began, but Sherrie hopped up and ran to our room. I threw my notebook on the couch and ran after her. She was already heading out with my notebooks. I gave her a look. She ran past me, not before I grabbed her ankle ( I had slipped on the floor and fell on my way down the hall). She pulled me along. " Arsenal! Let go!" she yelled.

" No! Go put those back!" I replied. We made it to the living room, and Sherrie handed Stacee my notebooks. " NO! Slowly...dying...good-bye..." I said, pretending to take in last breaths. I pretended to die and Drew said," Why do you always do that? You've been doing that ever since you were like, 11."

" Actually, since I was 4. It's fun," I answered. I got up and sat back down. Stacee was already looking through my books. I scowled. Stacee looked through all of my books, until finally, he reached the song I was writing. He gave me back my notebooks. " I like them. Can I use a few of them in the concerts?" Stacee asked.

" Uh...sure..." I replied. He wanted to sing some of my songs!

ROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGES ROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGES ROCKOFAGESROCKOFAGES

It was nighttime, and I was in my room, talking to my mom over the phone. Sherrie was in the bathroom brushing her hair.

" It's been going good so far. Stacee Jaxx is really cool! He read some of my song books and said he wanted to sing them on stage!" I said through the phone.

" That's great, honey! I'm so proud of you! I know your father either is!" she replied. Is?

" My father _is..._?" I asked. I heard her gasp.

" Oh, uh, I meant-" she stuttered.

" Mom, tell me the truth!" I begged. Sherrie looked at me and mouthed 'what's wrong?'. Drew entered the room. 'Daddy issues' I mouthed back. 'Ohhh' she replied.

I heard her sigh. " Arsenal, I talked to your father today. He called shortly before you did," she said.

" ...What?..." I asked.

" Arsenal, honey, he's so proud of you," she replied.

" But he left us! Why would he care about me? He probably wouldn't even like me if we _did _meet!" I said.

" Arsenal, don't say that! Your father loves you, he wouldn't have called if he didn't." I realized she was right. He wouldn't 'bother' us if he didn't love my mom or me.

" Can I ask a question?" I asked.

" ok..." my mom said, worry evident in her voice.

" How did you and dad meet?" I asked. She sighed.

" We met at the Bourbon. I was set to interview him and the band, since it was their first gig, and I was just at 17. He was amazed by my spit-fire attitude. Soon enough, we fell for each other. But, I had to go back to my office. But, you know what they say. If something loves you, it will come for you. And he did. I traveled with him and his band, and soon enough, you were born to us," she replied.

I had another question. " Mom, did you lie about why he leaved?" I asked.

" I'm sorry, Arsenal, I shouldn't have lied to you..." she whispered. She sounded on the verge of tears. I was angry, but I knew going off on her was a bad thing to do. She only wanted to protect me from the truth.

" Can I know the truth?" I asked.

" Your father left because of management." she replied. " They didn't think that you were important in his life, so they made him leave. It was either he stay or he went on with life." I felt a tear run down my face. He chose fame over me. And my mom.

" So, he chose fame instead of me?" I asked, choking back the sobs threatening to escape. Drew gave me a worried glance.

" No, no, no, honey, You have to understand why he did what he did. He left so he could get us a better life."

" What does that mean?"

" It means, he wanted you to grow up the way you're supposed to grow up. Happy. Even though he wasn't there, doesn't mean he still cared. He loves you more than you think. The only thing that mattered to him was your happiness." WOW. I man I thought didn't want anything to do with me, cared. He wanted me to live a good life.

" Honey, I've gotta go. I'm going to go see Lonny and Dennis to talk. I love you."

" Love you too."

"Bye, honey," she said. I hung up.

" What's wrong?" Drew asked.

" It was all a lie." I mumbled. I played with the buttons on the phone. " He wanted to be in my life, but fame took him from me." I wiped violently at the tears falling down my cheeks.

Sherrie gave me a sad look. " I need a moment," I said, running out of the room. I ran outside into the cool night air. Since the bus was stopped for the night, I stood out on the sidewalk. I began to sing a song I wrote.

_She stepped off the bus out into the city streets_

_Just a small town girl with her whole life_

_Packed in a suitcase by her feet_

Those verses reminded me of Sherrie.

_But somehow the lights didn't _

_shine as bright as they did_

_on her momma's TV screen_

_And the work seemed harder and the days seemed longer_

_than she'd ever thought they'd be..._

_But you know you got to stick to your guns_

_when it all comes down _

_'cause sometimes you can't choose _

_it's like heads they win, tails, you're gonna lose._

I was sitting on the pavement and staring at the stars. I was wondering if my dad was staring at them, too.

_Win big-Momma's fallen angel_

_Lose big-living out her lies_

_Wants it all-Momma's fallen angel_

_Lose it all, rolling the dice of her life..._

_Now she found herself in the fast lane living day to day_

_Turned her back on her best friends, yeah_

_And let her family slip away..._

Fresh tears fell.

_Just like a lost soul_

_caught up in the Hollywood scene_

_All the parties and the limousines_

_Such a good actress hiding all her pain_

_Trading her memories for fortune and fame_

_Just a step away from the edge of a fall_

_caught between heaven and hell_

_Where's the girl I knew a year ago?_

I heard Drew sing the last part. I looked up and saw him standing by me.

_Win big-Momma's fallen angel_

_Lose big-living out her lies_

_Wants it all-Momma's fallen angel_

_Lose it all, rolling the dice of her life_

_Too much too soon_

_or just a little too late_

_'Cause when her ship came in _

_She wasn't there and she just wouldn't wait..._

_Win big-Momma's fallen angel_

_Lose big-living out her lies_

_Wants it all-Momma's fallen angel_

_Lose it all, rolling the dice of her life_

_Win big-Momma's fallen angel_

_Lose big-living out her lies_

_Wants it all-Momma's fallen angel_

_Lose it all, rolling the dice of her life..._

Drew sat down beside me. We had a settled silence between us for a few minutes, but Drew finally said," Can you tell me what's going on?"

I took in a shaky breath and began. " My dad was famous. He wanted me to grow up around him. Management took him from me. He left so I could have a happy life."

" Oh wow...that's not too good," Drew replied.

" He met mom through an interview..."

" Hey, that sounds like Constance..." Drew said.

" Yeah, but I my dad _can't _and _isn't _Stacee Jaxx! AND, my mom didn't die during childbirth and I'm most certainly NOT dead!" I replied.

" Yeah, but how do you know that? Just think about it, it's not impossible, you know," Drew stated. I thought. I thought and thought and thought. It could be possible...No! Arsenal, NO! It's not possible! I snapped out of my thoughts when I heard the tour bus door open. I looked up and saw Stacee. Drew got up and said," Just think about it."

He passed by Stacee and went back inside. Stacee walked over to me and looked down at me. " You okay?" he asked.

" Yeah. I'm fine," I replied. Total lie. Why did I have to lie about it?

" You sure don't sound like it," Stacee replied. I chanced a look up at him. He was staring at me, as if he knew I was lying. " Do you wanna talk about it?"

I didn't reply. " Come on." He held out his hand. I took it. I stood up. Stacee led us toward a record store that was down the street. He opened the door for me and I stepped inside, him following me afterwards. Luckily, not a lot of people were in the store, so they didn't bother us.

I went over to the rock section. I saw Iron Maiden came out with a new record. They already had over 13, and they just wrote them like crazy. " What's bothering you, Arsenal?" Stacee asked, flicking through old records.

" It's about my dad..." I mumbled. Stacee stiffened a bit. I continued on.

" My mom told me a little about him. She told me how the met and why he left in the first place. She said that he's proud of me."

" Well, getting to tour with a famous band is a big deal. Why wouldn't anyone be proud?"

" Yeah...but I just don't think he really, genuinely cares about me. I mean, I'm just me. Nothing special, nothing amazing," I replied.

" Don't say that. He probably loves and cares for you more than you think," Stacee said, nudging my shoulder. I shrugged.

" I don't know. I just really want to meet him, but I have no idea who he is," I said back.

" He may be closer than you think," he said. I couldn't really believe this was Stacee Jaxx. He was very much changed, I knew that. He still drank and stuff, but not as much. It seemed weird.

" I don't know. Dreams will be dreams," I replied.

" I'll get you a record if you want," Stacee recommended.

" Nah, it's alright," I replied. The last thing I needed was to be spoiled. I wasn't ever really a spoiled child, unless you count being babysat by Lonny and Dennis and them bribing me with candy spoiled. I miss the old childhood days.

" I'm gonna go back to the tour bus. You coming?" I asked.

" No, you go ahead," Stacee replied.

I walked out of the store.

I heard singing from a few guys around me.

_Wow! Pretty woman, walking down the street_

_pretty woman, the kind I'd like to meet_

_Pretty woman, I don't believe you, it must be true_

_no one could look as good as you...mercy!_

Although I was very much flattered, I ignored them.

_Pretty woman, won't you pardon me?_

_Pretty woman, I couldn't help but see,_

_pretty woman, you look as lovely as you could be,_

_are you lonely just like me?_

_Argg..._

I knew they really meant no harm, but I quickened my pace.

_Pretty woman, stop awhile, pretty woman, talk a while_

_Pretty woman, give your smile to me_

_Pretty woman, yeah yeah yeah. pretty woman look my way_

_Pretty woman, say you'll stay with me_

_'cause I need you, need you tonight! UH!_

_Pretty woman, don't walk on by, pretty woman, don't make me cry_

_pretty woman, don't walk away, yeah, ok_

_If that's the way it must be, ok_

_I guess I'll go home , it's late, maybe tomorrow night..._

I reached the tour bus door, opened it, and looked back at the men still on the street.

_but wait, what do I see? _

_she's walking back to me_

_Wow! Wow! Pretty woman!_

I slammed close the door and rolled my eyes. "Sherrie!" I called out.

" Arsenal, in the bedroom!" Sherrie yelled back to me. I walked back to our bedroom, where Sherrie had the record player on. She had a worried look plastered on her face. " Are you alright?" she asked.

" Yeah. I think I just needed to relieve some stress." I took a few steps toward the bathroom. " I'm going to get ready for bed."

I walked in and shut the door. Taking a deep breath, I pulled out my razor blade. I still had some stress that needed to be relieved. I was getting better about cutting, though. I only did it every few months when nothing felt right and things like this happened. No one knew I did this.

I sat down and pressed the blade against my leg and began to pull. Once the crimson began to draw, I stopped and watched. It was practically pouring out of my leg. I grabbed a few paper towels and pressed them against my thigh. The bleeding eventually stopped, and I bandaged the cut. My legs had scars covering them. They were fading, but they were definitely still there and they still held some dark memories.

I got changed and brushed my teeth and all that junk, and went back out to our bunks. Sherrie was already asleep, so I didn't bother her. I sat on my bed and heard something crinkle under my weight. I looked back and saw I was sitting on the edge of a bright yellow bag. I picked it up and opened whatever was inside. It was the Iron Maiden record I was looking at in the record store. I smiled and lightly shook my head. Stacee knew I didn't want to be spoiled. Why'd he get it?


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter #3: The First Concert, Las Vegas

It was finally Saturday. The day of the first concert on the schedule, ad our first stop on the tour was Las Vegas. We were in a large building, and Sherrie was helping me get ready. I was nervous. I had been preparing all day on Friday, but I was still horrified I'd fail and get fired.

Sherrie had me in a denim skirt that had floral print on it, and an Arsenal tank with a black leather jacket over it. Sherrie was still trying to help me get used to the black boots. They felt fine, but they had a heel on them, which made it hard to walk for me. I finally sat down, frustration taking over. I nearly began to cry.

" Arsenal, what's up?" Sherrie asked. I took a deep breath. " What if I mess up? What if I get fired? What if-?" I stuttered.

Sherrie laughed. " Arsenal, you know that you won't mess up! You were practicing all day yesterday! Now come on, the show is beginning!" Sherrie stated. I got up as Wolfgang Voncolt (Drew's band) finished up. The lights dimmed down, and I walked out onto the stage by my keyboard. I took a deep breath as I saw Stacee appear. Soon enough, the lights turned bright, I began to play the keyboard to start off the song. The first song was a song I had written.

The crowd went nuts and the screams nearly blew out my eardrums.

_On the street where you live girls talk about their social lives_  
_They're made of lipstick, plastic and paint, a touch of sable in their eyes_  
_(All your life) all your life all you've asked when's your daddy gonna talk to you_  
_But you were living in another world tryin' to get your message through._

I liked those lines. I had written this song for my mom. She always was ignored by my grandpa and grandma (from what she told me), and no one listened to her cry for attention when she deserved it.

_No one heard a single word you said._  
_They should have seen it in your eyes_  
_What was going around your head._

My mom left home when she was 16. She was tired of living in the shadows, and she left for Hollywood. No one knew why she left.

_Ooh, she's a little runaway._  
_Daddy's girl learned fast_  
_All those things he couldn't say._  
_Ooh, she's a little runaway._

She was a runaway.

_Take a line every night guaranteed to blow your mind_  
_I see you out on the streets, calling for a wild time_  
_So you sit home alone 'cause there's nothing left that you can do_  
_There's only pictures hung in the shadows left there to look at you_

She got a job as a magazine article writer/ reporter, and she became a big success.

_You know she likes the lights at nights on the neon Broadway signs_  
_She don't really mind, it's only love she hoped to find_

She went to Hollywood because she heard many great things about it and she came there for one reason. Love.

_No one heard a single word she said_  
_They should have seen it in your eyes_  
_What was going around your head._

But, she soon lost her job as a reporter for writing the truth about her job. She began working at the Bourbon, where her friends, Lonny and Dennis, gave her a job. She had known them since she had first arrived in Hollywood.

_Ooh, she's a little runaway_  
_Daddy's girl learned fast_  
_All those things he couldn't say_

My mom got a good job offer as a nurse at the local hospital. She resigned as a waitress and began working there instead. That's all I knew when I asked her.

_Ooh, she's a little runaway_  
_Daddy's girl learned fast_  
_Now she works the night away_

_Ooh, she's a little runaway_  
_Daddy's girl learned fast_  
_All those things he couldn't say_

_Ooh, she's a little runaway_  
_Daddy's girl learned fast_  
_Now she works the night away_

I smiled lightly and we began another song, this time it was written by Stacee. Sherrie had told me he sang it at the Bourbon Room.

_Step inside, walk this way_  
_ You and me babe, Hey, hey!_

Ok,then...

_ Love is like a bomb, baby, c'mon get it on_  
_ Livin' like a lover with a radar phone_  
_ Lookin' like a tramp, like a video vamp_  
_ Demolition woman, can I be your man?_  
_ Razzle 'n' a dazzle 'n' a flash a little light_  
_ Television lover, baby, go all night_  
_ Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet_  
_ Little miss ah innocent sugar me, yeah_

Well then...

_ Hey!_  
_ C'mon, take a bottle, shake it up_  
_ Break the bubble, break it up_

_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ Ooh, in the name of love_  
_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ C'mon, fire me up_  
_ Pour your sugar on me_  
_ Oh, I can't get enough_

_ I'm hot, sticky sweet_  
_ From my head to my feet, yeah_

Yup. Definitely the Stacee Jaxx I new before.

_ Listen! red light, yellow light, green-a-light go!_  
_ Crazy little woman in a one man show_  
_ Mirror queen, mannequin, rhythm of love_  
_ Sweet dream, saccharine, loosen up_

_ You gotta squeeze a little, squeeze a little_  
_ Tease a little more_  
_ Easy operator come a knockin' on my door_  
_ Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet_  
_ Little miss innocent sugar me, yeah, yeah_  
_ Give a little more_

_ Take a bottle, shake it up_  
_ Break the bubble, break it up_

_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ Ooh, in the name of love_  
_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ C'mon fire me up_  
_ Pour your sugar on me_  
_ Oh, I can't get enough_

_ I'm hot, sticky sweet_  
_ From my head to my feet yeah_

One word. Explicit.

_ You got the peaches, I got the cream_  
_ Sweet to taste, saccharine_  
_ 'cause I'm hot, say what, sticky sweet_  
_ From my head, my head, to my feet_

_ Do you take sugar? one lump or two?_

_ Take a bottle, shake it up_  
_ Break the bubble, break it up_

_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ Ooh, in the name of love_  
_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ C'mon fire me up_  
_ Pour your sugar on me_  
_ Oh, I can't get enough_  
_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ Oh, in the name of love_  
_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ Get it, come get it_  
_ Pour your sugar on me_  
_ Ooh_  
_ Pour some sugar on me_  
_ Yeah! Sugar me!_

Definitely one of Stacee's songs, that's for sure. Next was mine. It was the one I had been working on about my dad.

_I should have known better_  
_ Than to let you go alone,_  
_ It's times like these_  
_ I can't make it on my own_  
_ Wasted days, and sleepless nights_  
_ And I can't wait to see you again_

_ I find I spend my time_  
_ Waiting on your call,_  
_ How can I tell you, baby_  
_ My back's against the wall_  
_ I need you by my side_  
_ To tell me it's alright,_  
_ 'Cos I don't think I can take anymore_

Stacee signaled to me, as if he wanted me to join him in singing. I happily did. Let me explain those lyrics. I've been waiting to talk to my dad for 14 years. I needed him when I was feeling down, so he could tell me it was going to be alright.  
_Is this love that I'm feeling,_  
_ Is this the love, that I've been searching for_  
_ Is this love or am I dreaming,_  
_ This must be love,_  
_ 'Cos it's really got a hold on me,_  
_ A hold on me..._

_ I can't stop the feeling_  
_ I've been this way before_  
_ But, with you I've found the key_  
_ To open any door_  
_ I can feel my love for you_  
_ Growing stronger day by day,_  
_ An' I can't wait to see you again_  
_ So I can hold you in my arms_

_ Is this love that I'm feeling,_  
_ Is this the love, that I've been searching for_  
_ Is this love or am I dreaming,_  
_ This must be love,_  
_ 'Cos it's really got a hold on me,_  
_ A hold on me..._

_ Is this love that I'm feeling,_  
_ Is this the love, that I've been searching for..._  
_ Is this love or am I dreaming,_  
_ Is this the love, that I've been searching for..._

I was getting better at this concert thing. It was fun, actually. Stacee began on the song I had written.

_If you've got love in your sights _  
_ Watch out, love bites_

_If you've got love in your sights make love, do you look in the mirror? _  
_ Who do you think of, does he look like me? _  
_ Do you tell lies and say that it's forever? _  
_ Do you think twice, or just touch 'n' see? _  
_ Ooh babe ooh yeah _

I wrote that about my ex. No, we never did IT, I never let it get that far. BUT, I caught him doing it with some other chick. I wrote this after we broke up. I made a few edits, but it was still pretty good.

_ When you're alone, do you let go? _  
_ Are you wild 'n' willin' or is it just for show? _  
_ Ooh c'mon _

_ I don't wanna touch you too much baby _  
_ 'Cos making love to you might drive me crazy _  
_ I know you think that love is the way you make it _  
_ So I don't wanna be there when you decide to break it _  
_ No! _

_ Love bites, love bleeds _  
_ It's bringin' me to my knees _  
_ Love lives, love dies _  
_ It's no surprise _  
_ Love begs, love pleads _  
_ It's what I need _

_ When I'm with you are you somewhere else? _  
_ Am I gettin' thru or do you please yourself? _  
_ When you wake up will you walk out? _  
_ It can't be love if you throw it about _  
_ Ooh babe _

_ I don't wanna touch you too much baby _  
_ 'Cos making love to you might drive me crazy _

_ Ooh yeah _

_ Love bites, love bleeds _  
_ It's bringin' me to my knees _  
_ Love lives, love dies _

_ If you've got love in your sights _  
_ Watch out, love bites _  
_ Yes it does _  
_ It will be hell _

I did not like love that much. It always stabbed me in the heart. Pain, hurt, rejection, and sadness was what it caused.

_It's all the same, only the names will change _

_Everyday it seems we're wasting away _

_Another place where the faces are so cold I'd drive all night just to get back home_  
_ I'm a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride I'm wanted dead or alive _

_Wanted dead or alive_  
_ Sometimes I sleep, sometimes it's not for days _

_And the people I meet always go their separate ways _

_Sometimes you tell the day _

_By the bottle that you drink _

_And times when you're alone all you do is think_

_ I walk these streets, a loaded six string on my back I play for keeps, 'cause I might not make it back_

_ I been everywhere, and I'm standing tall I've seen a million faces an I've rocked them all_  
_ I'm a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride _

_I'm wanted dead or alive_

_ I'm a cowboy, I got the night on my side_

_ I'm wanted dead or alive And I ride, dead or alive_

_ I still drive, dead or alive Dead or alive [x4] _

Sherrie told me Stacee wrote that song at the Bourbon Room.

_Once upon a time Not so long ago _  
_ Tommy used to work on the docks Union's been on strike He's down on his luck...it's tough, so tough Gina works the diner all day Working for her man, she brings home her pay For love - for love _  
_ She says we've got to hold on to what we've got 'Cause it doesn't make a difference If we make it or not We've got each other and that's a lot For love - we'll give it a shot _  
_ Whooah, we're half way there Livin' on a prayer Take my hand and we'll make it - I swear Livin' on a prayer _  
_ Tommy's got his six string in hock Now he's holding in what he used To make it talk - so tough, it's tough Gina dreams of running away When she cries in the night Tommy whispers baby it's okay, someday _  
_ We've got to hold on to what we've got 'Cause it doesn't make a difference If we make it or not We've got each other and that's a lot For love - we'll give it a shot _

_ We've got to hold on ready or not You live for the fight when it's all that you've got _

Good job, Stacee. I had helped him write that song yesterday. Only a few more songs to go.

_This ain't a song for the broken-hearted _  
_ No silent prayer for the faith-departed _  
_ I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd _  
_ You're gonna hear my voice _  
_ When I shout it out loud _

_ It's my life _  
_ It's now or never _  
_ I ain't gonna live forever _  
_ I just want to live while I'm alive _  
_ (It's my life) _  
_ My heart is like an open highway _  
_ Like Frankie said _  
_ I did it my way _  
_ I just wanna live while I'm alive _  
_ It's my life _

_ This is for the ones who stood their ground _  
_ For Tommy and Gina who never backed down _  
_ Tomorrow's getting harder make no mistake _  
_ Luck ain't even lucky _  
_ Got to make your own breaks _

_ It's my life _  
_ And it's now or never _  
_ I ain't gonna live forever _  
_ I just want to live while I'm alive _  
_ (It's my life) _  
_ My heart is like an open highway _  
_ Like Frankie said _  
_ I did it my way _  
_ I just want to live while I'm alive _  
_ 'Cause it's my life _

_ Better stand tall when they're calling you out _  
_ Don't bend, don't break, baby, don't back down _

_ It's my life _  
_ And it's now or never _  
_ 'Cause I ain't gonna live forever _  
_ I just want to live while I'm alive _  
_ (It's my life) _  
_ My heart is like an open highway _  
_ Like Frankie said _  
_ I did it my way _  
_ I just want to live while I'm alive _  
_It's my life _  
_ And it's now or never _  
_ 'Cause I ain't gonna live forever _  
_ I just want to live while I'm alive _  
_ (It's my life) _  
_ My heart is like an open highway _  
_ Like Frankie said _  
_ I did it my way _  
_ I just want to live while I'm alive_  
_ 'Cause it's my life!_

Only 3 more songs and then it'll be over. My fingers were dancing all over the keyboard.

_I guess this time you're really leaving I heard your suitcase say goodbye Well as my broken heart lies bleeding you say true love is suicide_  
_ You say you've cried a thousand rivers And now you're swimming for the shore You left me drowning in my tears And you won't save me anymore_  
_ Now I'm praying to God you'll give me one more chance, girl_  
_ I'll be there for you These five words I swear to you When you breathe I want to be the air for you I'll be there for you I'd live and I'd die for you I'd steal the sun from the sky for you Words can't say what love can do I'll be there for you_  
_ I know you know we've had some good times Now they have their own hiding place Well I can promise you tomorrow But I can't buy back yesterday_  
_ And Baby you know my hands are dirty But I wanted to be your valentine I'll be the water when you get thirsty, baby When you get drunk, I'll be the wine_  
_ I'll be there for you These five words I swear to you When you breathe I want to be the air for you I'll be there for you I'd live and I'd die for you Steal the sun from the sky for you Words can't say what a love can do I'll be there for you_

_ And I wasn't there when you were happy I wasn't there when you were down I didn't mean to miss your birthday, baby I wish I'd seen you blow those candles out_  
_ I'll be there for you These five words I swear to you When you breathe I want to be the air for you I'll be there for you I'd live and I'd die for you Steal the sun from the sky for you Words can't say what a love can do I'll be there for you_

That song brought tears to my eyes. It reminded me of my father. I had wrote it for him.

_An angel's smile is what you sell You promise me heaven, then put me through hell Chains of love got a hold on me When passion's a prison, you can't break free _  
_ You're a loaded gun There's nowhere to run No one can save me The damage is done _  
_ Shot through the heart And you're to blame _

_You give love a bad name_

_ I play my part and you play your game You give love a bad name You give love a bad name _  
_ Paint your smile on your lips Blood red nails on your fingertips A school boy's dream, you act so shy Your very first kiss was your first kiss goodbye _  
_ You're a loaded gun There's nowhere to run No one can save me The damage is done _  
_Shot through the heart And you're to blame You give love a bad name I play my part and you play your game You give love a bad name You give love a bad na__me_

Last song!

_Just a small town girl_  
_ Livin' in a lonely world_  
_ She took the midnight train_  
_ Goin' anywhere_  
_ Just a city boy_  
_ Born and raised in South Detroit_  
_ He took the midnight train_  
_ Goin' anywhere_

_ A singer in a smokey room_  
_ A smell of wine and cheap perfume_  
_ For a smile they can share the night_  
_ It goes on and on and on and on_

_ Strangers waiting_  
_ Up and down the boulevard_  
_ Their shadows searching_  
_ In the night_  
_ Streetlights, people_  
_ Livin' just to find emotion_  
_ Hidin', somewhere in the night_

_ Workin' hard to get my fill_  
_ Everybody wants a thrill_  
_ Payin' anything to roll the dice_  
_ Just one more time_  
_ Some will win_  
_ Some will lose_  
_ Some were born to sing the blues_  
_ Oh, the movie never ends_  
_ It goes on and on and on and on_

Stacee gave out a call to Sherrie and Drew, and soon enough they came out on stage and began singing along with Stacee and me.

_ Strangers waiting_  
_ Up and down the boulevard_  
_ Their shadows searching_  
_ In the night_  
_ Streetlights, people_  
_ Livin' just to find emotion_  
_ Hidin', somewhere in the night_

_ Don't stop believin'_  
_ Hold on to the feelin'_  
_ Streetlights, people_  
_ Don't stop believin'_  
_ Hold on_  
_ Streetlights, people _

The lights grew brighter, and the crowd was going crazy. The lights dimmed, and we headed off the stage. Sherrie hugged me tightly. " You did great!" she said. I smiled. " You too!"

I couldn't believe I had done so well. And for my first concert. Stacee Jaxx came over to us. " Great job, Arsenal, Sherrie." I replied by saying," Thanks."

He gave a single nod and walked back to his dressing room. Sherrie turned back to me and asked," Did you write a few of those songs?"

" Yeah, actually," I answered. She smiled and slapped my arm lightly. " See? Now are you happy that I gave him your song book?"

" Wait, you gave it to him?" I asked. She nodded slyly. " Sherrie...you're lucky you're like my sister." She smiled more.

" I don't think you know how proud Carrie is," Sherrie said. Carrie was my mom's name.

" Yeah, she probably misses me. I'm not usually away from her," I stated. Sherrie opened her mouth to reply, but frowned. And Sherrie never frowned. I turned around to see what or WHO she was frowning at. It was a man with blonde hair back in a ponytail and deep brown eyes. Something about him seemed...off. " Sherrie, who's that?" I asked.

" That's Garrett, Arsenal's manager."

" What? I don't have a manager."

" It's the band, weirdo." I nodded and flushed at my stupidity. " Anyways, he's a real jerk. I don't understand why Stacee doesn't fire him. He's tried coming onto me!" Sherrie whispered.

" Ew," I replied, making a face. Sherrie nodded. " Come on. We need to get changed," Sherrie said, pulling me into our dressing room. I got out of my outfit and changed into a light orange dress with my black converse and a jean jacket. Sherrie was in a black dress with heels.

" Wanna go shopping?" Sherrie asked.

" ...Ok. But, I need to grab my purse from the bus," I said.

" I'll wait here," Sherrie replied, sitting in a chair. I ran out of the room and down a long hall. I opened the door at the end and felt the cool air hit my face. Ignoring it, I ran over to the bus and opened the door. I walked slowly down the hall, and I heard voices. I stopped to listen. " Garrett, I know she is. She's gotta be." It was Stacee.

" How do you know for sure?" Garrett asked.

" I just...do," Stacee replied. What were they talking about?

" There's only one way to know for sure. We'll have to go for blood work," Garrett said more like a fact than an opinion. Hmph.

I went into my room and grabbed my black shoulder bag. When I went back into the hall, however, the voices had faded, as if they had never been there before. I was confused. What had they been talking about? What was exactly happening?


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter #4: The Hospital

" ARSENAL! COME ON!" Drew yelled through the bathroom door.

"NO!" I yelled back. Sherrie, Drew, Garrett, and Stacee wanted me to go to the hospital for blood work. Whenever I got near blood, I was for sure to faint. Drew even knew that because of this one time when he watched me. He accidentally cut himself with letter opener, and his finger began to bleed. I ended up throwing up and fainting. Ironic, isn't it? When I'd cut, blood would pour, but I'd never EVER faint. That's one of the reasons why I stopped. Or, well, not cut as much.

" Arsenal, it'll be ok!" Sherrie assured.

" NO IT WON'T! Last time I saw blood, I fainted! There is no way in HELL I am going in there!" I yelled. They couldn't make me even go. Why did I have to get blood work done?

" Arsenal, calm down. It'll be fine," Stacee said. I could almost hear him rolling his eyes. I leaned back against the door. Only the lock on the door and myself were keeping them from coming in here.

" Arsenal, I will beat down this door!" Drew warned.

" Drew, I will jump out this window," I shot back. Yes, there was a small window in the bathroom.

" Arsenal, just come on!" Garrett said." I will get Stacee's body guard's out here!" I sighed. I didn't think I was gonna win this battle. I unlocked the door and cracked it slightly. " I swear to god..." I mumbled.

" Good girl. Now come on," Garrett said. I shot him a death glare. I didn't like him at all. Even after about a month and a half, I still didn't. Drew grabbed my upper left arm. Great. He pulled me out of the bathroom and Stacee grabbed my other arm. No escaping now...

They lifted me off the ground and carried me off of the bus. I looked back at Sherrie. She had her head down. We got into a limo, and even in there, Stacee and Drew wouldn't let go, and Stacee's body guards kept their eyes on me at all times. " Don't let go. She can find a way to escape. Trust me," Drew said.

" You guys are mean," I mumbled. We finally got to the hospital, and I had to admit, even in Austin, Texas, the hospitals were HUGE. Bigger than any one I've ever seen. Once again, I was lifted up and taken inside, and for some reason, the guards stayed near the limo, most likely to keep fans away. I began to breathe heavily.

A nurse came up to us. " Can I help you?" she asked with a southern drawl.

" We have an appointment for Arsenal Jackson today," Garrett said. Wait...they planned this? The nurse checked her clip board. " Oh! Arsenal,...ARSENAL!" the lady yelled. Oh god. She must've been a big fan. She kept her calm, though.

" Right this way," she squeaked. She led us down a winding hall and to a door. Stacee and Drew set me down on a chair, and I began to feel dizzy. I looked at the window. " Arsenal, don't you dare," Drew said. I looked at him for a long while, then in a flash, got up and ran to the window.

" DAMNIT, ARSENAL!" Drew yelled. He pulled me back. I began kicking him. " Ow! Arsenal, quit it! OW!"

Stacee grabbed my feet, keeping me from kicking my feet. " Let go!" I yelled.

" Arsenal, it'll be fine. Calm down!" Sherrie said. The nurse, who had left, came back in with a mask and tank. " NO!" I yelled. I bit the Stacee's hand. " OW!"

" HOLD HER DOWN!" the nurse yelled. Drew pinned me down to the small cot in the room and the lady placed the mask over my mouth and nose. I began to relax and feel dizzy. They had put me on that laugh-gas stuff. I blinked a few times and the nurse removed the mask. Drew told me what had happened while I was on the laughy gas, and well, here it goes.

I had begun to play with Sherrie's hair, since she was closest to me. " What's wrong with her?" Sherrie asked.

" It's laughing gas. It should keep her under a 'drunk-state' for a while," the nurse explained. Sherrie nodded as I began to giggle. I poked her nose. She grew irritated, and Stacee said," You can take my spot."

" The doctor will be here shortly," the nurse said, walking out. I had begun to roll around on the cot. I soon fell off. " Oh god," Drew groaned.

" Well, you have to admit, she warned us," Sherrie shrugged. The doctor came into the room. " Okay, Ms. Jackson?" the doctor asked, staring down at me on the ground. " I assume the laughing gas?"

" Yeah," Garrett said. He nodded. " Well, that's quite alright. Most of the patients here use it, anyways. She's one of the best ones to use it," the doctor explained. " Ok, just set her onto that chair."

Stacee grabbed under my underarms and dragged me over to the chair. The doctor checked both arms for the most blood, and my right had more. He wrapped the upper arm in a purple band and stuck a needle into my arm. I had gasped slightly, but my head only moved to the side. A small tube filled with crimson, and the doctor pulled out the needle and put a bandage onto my arm. " Ok, Mr. Jaxx, we will call you when the results come in," the doctor stated, leading us out of the room, Stacee dragging me along as I mumbled odd things.

" Will she be alright?" Sherrie asked.

" Yes, just give her a few hours and she will return back to normal," the doctor said. He walked off without another word. Stacee had dragged me along, and I kept trying to walk off towards the nurses' area. From what Drew had told me, Stacee got irritated and just slung me over his shoulder. So now, a few hours later, I was back to normal again, and Drew had told me everything.

I couldn't help but laugh a little when he told me. It sounded like something that would happen to me. But, I still had one question on my mind. " Drew?" I asked.

" What?" he asked.

" Why did I have to get blood work done and no one else?" I asked. He looked taken aback for a minute, as if he couldn't think of a response.

" That's for someone else to explain," Drew stated, placing a hand on my shoulder. I smiled lightly and looked at Drew. His eyes were really beautiful...what? No! Arsenal, how dare you! He's Sherrie's!

He looked at me with a different look. His face grew closer. Oh no. Please. I can't lose Sherrie because I kissed Drew. Just as his lips nearly touched mine, I heard a yell from the living room. " OH MY GOD! IT'S TRUE! I KNEW IT!" It was Sherrie. Drew pulled back suddenly, and so did I. Thanks, Sherrie. :)

" Uh...let's not-"

" Yeah...good idea." We ran out of Drew's room and into the living room. Sherrie and Garrett were staring at a piece of paper in Stacee's hand. As soon as they saw me, however, they quickly hid the paper. " What's going on?" I asked.

" Uh...nothin'..." Sherrie mumbled.

" Yeah, right. Tell me," I said. She nodded 'no'. I got really mad.

" Why don't you guys tell me anything?" I demanded.

" You're the youngest," Garrett said.

" So? That doesn't mean I'm a baby!" I glared at them all.

" Ok! Let's go outside," Garrett said, pushing me over to the door.

" What? No! You guys are being unfair!" I said. He opened the door and walked out. As soon as I made it onto firm ground, Garrett shut the door. I whipped around and beat on it. It was locked now. " HEY! THIS ISN'T FAIR! I HAVE THE RIGHT TO KNOW!" I cried. Why couldn't I know? It was my life and my blood, for god's sake!

I leaned against the side of the bus and began to cry. Life was unfair. I decided to go over to the park behind the bus, which was across the street. I walked over to it and sat down on a swing and looked at the moon. Why did everyone lie to me? My mom, Sherrie, Drew, everyone. I was tired of all the lies. I wanted the truth.

_Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick, And think of you_

_ Caught up in circles confusion - Is nothing new_

_ Flashback - warm nights - Almost left behind_

I looked away as fresh tears cascaded down my face.

_ Suitcases of memories, Time after -_  
_ Sometimes you picture me - I'm walking too far ahead_

_ You're calling to me, I can't hear What you've said -_

_ Then you say - go slow - I fall behind - _

_The second hand unwinds_  
_ If you're lost you can look - and you will find me_

_ Time after time_

_ If you fall I will catch you - I'll be waiting _

_Time after time_

I got up from the swing and made my way over to the slide. I climbed up to the top and sat down.  
_ After my picture fades and darkness has Turned to gray_

_ Watching through windows - you're wondering If I'm OK_

_ Secrets stolen from deep inside The drum beats out of time -_

_ If you're lost_

_you can look and you will find me_

_time after time_

_if you fall, I will catch you, I'll be waiting,_

_Time after time_  
_ You said go slow - I fall behind The second hand unwinds -_  
_ If you're lost you can look and you will find me_

_time after time_

_if you fall I will catch you, I'll be waiting_

_time after time_

_ ...Time after time_

_ Time after time _

_Time after time _

_Time after time..._

I was tired of all the lies. Of the people. Of...my dad. I was just sick of it. I cried even more just thinking about it. I went down the slide and climbed up the large oak tree across from it. I just wanted to jump down and break my neck. Just...screw it. It didn't matter anymore, anyways. " I'm done, world. Dad. I'm done with all of it. Take me. Show me a sign, please," I mumbled. Something happened. A german shepherd down at the trunk of the tree. It barked up to me, as if telling me to climb down.

" Go away," I cried. It tilted its head and sat down, as if it was waiting for me now. I sighed, realizing this dog wouldn't let me do anything. I crawled back down and sat against the tree trunk. The dog sat by me. " Who's your owner?" I asked. She whimpered. I looked at her neck. No collar. Poor girl. " No home," I mumbled. I felt her fur. It was fluffy and warm, shockingly. I ran my hands through it.

I heard someone walking towards me. I looked up and saw Drew and Stacee. " Oh...it's _you_," I spat. Drew sighed.

" Arsenal, we're sorry," Stacee said.

" Then why can't I know? And why did you kick me outside? You guys aren't who I'd thought you were," I said.

"You will know soon enough, I promise," Stacee assured. Drew noticed the dog. " Where'd the dog come from?"

" I don't know. She found me and wouldn't leave me alone until I came down from the tree and saw her," I shrugged. Drew hunched down and pet her soft fur. She licked his hand. Drew smiled. " I like her. Who does she belong to?"

" No one. She doesn't have a collar." Drew looked at Stacee.

" I kind of want to take her with us," Drew said, looking at Stacee. I had wanted to also. She was such a sweet stray dog. " Give him the innocent eyes," Drew whispered to me. I did it. I gave him my world-famous innocent eyes. AND, Stacee fell right into the trap.

" Fine. What's her name?" Stacee sighed. The dog came in between my arms and licked Stacee's hand. " Her name's Bolt," I smiled. I noticed Hey Man running towards us. He ran up to Bolt and jumped onto her back. I at first thought he was going to hurt her, but instead, he sat there and pet her fur.

I was still angry at Stacee and everyone else, but at least they let me keep Bolt. But, even they knew that I wanted answers. And quick.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter #5: Memories

I woke up with Bolt staring at me from my bedside. I gasped when I opened my eyes and blinked a few times. I heard Sherrie toss from above me. Bolt whimpered and pelted out of the room. I sat up and went over to my dresser. Sherrie had already laid out clothes for me to wear, which I assumed she did last night. She had laid out a dress that was lime green with black lace covering it, with a skull design on the top. She also had my black converse out and black tights. After I slipped that on, I noticed Sherrie in the mirror behind me. She was propped up on an elbow, looking at me. " You look cute," she said.

" Thanks," I replied. She hopped off of the bunk and played with my hair. " You have so much hair," she stated.

" I know," I replied. She laid it down my back. " I'm taking you shopping today," she said, getting dressed. Ok. I could deal with that. I grabbed my shoulder bag and Sherrie got dressed and all that junk. She took my hand and led me down the hall. Drew was sitting in the living room with Bolt, who had run out after I had woken up. He was playing with her. " Where's Stacee?" Sherrie asked.

" He's still asleep," Drew replied. Sherrie nodded and looked through her purse. " Shit! Arsenal, wait here!" Sherrie said, running back to the bunk room. I sighed and sat down by Drew. " How's your day been?" he asked.

" Better than most." He nodded and I stared at the wall. I soon drifted off into La-La land.

_I was heading towards the Bourbon Room. A thirteen year-old me walked down the street, Walkman in hand, humming lightly. It was night, and I was supposed to go and hang out with Dennis and Lonny while my mom was working the shift at the hospital. All of the rockers and prostitutes were out on the streets, and I was now across from the Bourbon. A small crowd was gathered around the entrance; the church crowd. _

_I pulled off my headphones and shoved them into my shoulder bag, my records in the other hand (which was in a small suitcase). A man came up to me. He had brown hair. " Hey...what's your name?" he asked. _

_"Arsenal," I replied. _

_" Nice name." I smiled slightly. He then reached down for my suitcase. " HEY! NO!" I yelled. He pulled towards himself, and I was being dragged along. I heard a male voice across the street yell," HEY!"_

_My grip finally loosened and he ran off with the suitcase while I fell over, my bag falling onto the ground and spilling my things out. " No," I cried. " My records..." I bent down to get my things, and someone ran over to me. I looked up and saw a boy with curly brown hair and brown eyes. " Are you hurt? Are you alright?" he asked, bending down to help me out. _

_" Yeah...he stole my records..." I mumbled, tears running down my face. " This sucks." He put a hand on my shoulder. " Hey, it'll be alright. You can get records again." I shrugged and sighed._

_" I'm Drew," the boy said. _

_" Arsenal," I replied, stuffing the rest of my bag. He smiled. " I like your name." I smiled back. _

_" Where are you heading?" Drew asked. _

_" The Bourbon."_

_" Oh, really? I work there now!" Drew exclaimed. I smiled slightly, and he helped me up. " Did you just move here?" I asked._

_" Yeah," he replied. We walked across the street and into the Bourbon, which didn't have too many people tonight, considering it was a Monday. Lonny, who was sitting on a bar stool, came over to us. He must've noticed how my face was red, because he said," Arsenal, what's wrong?" _

_" Someone mugged her," Drew said for me. _

_" Oh," Lonny replied. " Well, I'm sure they'll show up eventually." I nodded slightly. _

_" Ah, I see you've met Drew," Dennis said, walking over to us. _

_" Yeah. He saw me get mugged and helped me out," I said. Dennis's face dropped. "Stupid people," he mumbled. Just then, my mother, Carrie, ran into the Bourbon. _

_" Arsenal!" she said. She walked over to us. " My shift is over." She looked at Drew with confusion. " Oh! That's Drew," Dennis said. My mom nodded and shook hands with Drew. _

_" Mom, someone stole my records..." I trailed off. _

_" What? Did you get mugged?" she asked. I nodded. _

_" Drew helped me, though," I added. _

_" Thank you, Drew. For helping Arsenal," my mom said to Drew. _

_" It's no problem," Drew said. _

_" Do you have a place to stay?" I asked. I knew if my mom knew if he had no where to stay, she would let him stay with us. _

_" Uh...no."_

_" Mom, can Drew stay with us?" I asked. She looked at me. Drew looked a little hopeful himself. She sighed. _

_" There's no way out of this, is there?" she asked. I smiled real big, and so did Drew. _

_" Come on, you two," she said, smiling. She turned around and Drew gave me a quick hug. " Thank you," he said. _

_" No problem," I had replied._

Sherrie walked back into the room with glasses on. " Come on, Arsenal," she said. She grabbed my hand and led me out onto the street. " Have you been having a good day so far?" Sherrie asked.

" Yeah...why does everyone keep asking that?" I replied.

" Well, I'm just wondering. Plus I need to tell you something," Sherrie responded, turning down the street.

" What is it?" I asked.

" I'll tell you soon enough," Sherrie replied," Oh. Put these glasses on. People won't recognize you and attack you if they don't think you're famous."

And that was the end of our conversation. As I put on the glasses, I zoned off once again, but this time, it was when I met Sherrie.

_" Damnit!" I heard someone yell from the bar at the Bourbon. I looked up from the table I was sitting at and saw a girl with blonde hair looking at a tray that had tipped over and broke all the glasses. _

_I got up after setting down my book and hurried over to the bar. " Are you ok?" I asked, watching as she cleaned up the glass. I picked up a few pieces that landed on the bar. She looked up and said," Yeah."_

_" Here, I'll help you," I offered. She didn't reply, so I got down on my hands and knees and picked up some of the glass. She then said," You don't have to help me."_

_" No, I want to. My name's Arsenal. I always come here," I introduced. The girl looked up._

_" Arsenal? Like the band?" she asked. _

_" Yeah," I smiled. _

_" That's my favorite band. I'm Sherrie," she replied. _

_" So did you get a job here?"_

_" Yes. Just last night." _

_" I figured. Have you met Drew yet? He's my friend."_

_" Yeah," she got a dreamy look in her eyes. _

_" I think someone likes Drew," I sang. She blushed. _

_" He asked me out on a date tonight," she mumbled. _

_" What are you going to wear?" _

_" Well, I honestly don't have anything so I think I'll just wear whatever I have." _

_" Hm... I can give you a dress I have, if you want it. I won't be in town tomorrow because I'm going to a concert. I'm mad because I won't see Arsenal now," I said._

_" Really? You'd let me use a dress?" she asked. _

_" Of course." I finished cleaning up the glass and I threw them into a garbage bin. " We can go now if you want. Or I can run home and get the dress." _

_" Either way will work." _

I snapped out of my little trance when I saw a hand go flying across my face. " Hello? Earth to Arsenal!" Sherrie giggled.

" Oh. Sorry."

" We're here. Do you want to look at clothes or check out the record store?" Sherrie asked.

" How about we get clothes and then records," I suggested. Sherrie nodded and we headed towards a clothing store. I ended up getting two dresses (Sherrie's choice), three rock band shirts, a new denim skirt, and a pair of light and dark jeans. I also got a new pair of converse and vans. We began walking away from the store and across the main entrance.

People were pushing eagerly through the crowd. " What do you think's going on?" Sherrie asked as she nearly got knocked over by a group of girls.

" Let's follow them and see," I said. Sherrie nodded and we followed everyone until we reached a large crowd. We pushed through it until we reached the middle. Music began to play followed by someone singing.

_Why, you wanna tell me how to live my life?_  
_ Who, are you to tell me if it's black or white?_  
_ Mama, can you hear me? Try to understand._  
_ Is innocence the difference between a boy and a man?_  
_ My daddy lived the lie, that's just the price that he paid_  
_ Sacrificed his life, just slavin' away._

I pushed Sherrie and myself to the front of the crowd and up to the stage. A boy who looked to be around my age was singing. He had poofy sandy brown hair and dark blue eyes (looks like Jon Bon Jovi XD). He was wearing a button-down shirt which exposed his chest, which had a six-pack of abs. His voice was good and strong.

_Ohhh, if there's one thing I hang onto,_  
_ That gets me through the night._  
_ I ain't gonna do what I don't want to,_  
_ I'm gonna live my life._  
_ Shining like a diamond, rolling with the dice,_  
_ Standing on the ledge, I show the wind how to fly._  
_ When the world gets in my face,_  
_ I say, Have A Nice Day._  
_ Have A Nice Day_

_Take a look around you; nothing's what it seems_  
_ We're living in the broken home of hopes and dreams,_  
_ Let me be the first to shake a helping hand._  
_ Anybody brave enough to take a stand,_  
_ I've knocked on every door, on every dead end street,_  
_ Looking for forgiveness,_  
_ what's left to believe?_

_ Ohhh, if there's one thing I hang onto,_  
_ That gets me through the night._  
_ I ain't gonna do what I don't want to,_  
_ I'm gonna live my life._  
_ Shining like a diamond, rolling with the dice,_  
_ Standing on the ledge, I show the wind how to fly._  
_ When the world gets in my face,_  
_ I say, Have A Nice Day._  
_ Have A Nice Day._

_ Ohhh, if there's one thing I hang onto,_  
_ That gets me through the night._  
_ I ain't gonna do what I don't want to,_  
_ I'm gonna live my life._  
_ Shining like a diamond, rolling with the dice,_  
_ Standing on the ledge, I show the wind how to fly._  
_ When the world gets in my face,_  
_ I say, Have A Nice Day._  
_ Have A Nice Day._  
_ Have A Nice Day._  
_ Have A Nice Day._  
_ Have A Nice Day._

_ When The world keeps trying, to drag me down,_  
_ I gotta raise my hands, I'm gonna stand my ground._  
_ Well I say, Have A Nice Day._  
_ Have A Nice Day_  
_ Have A Nice Day_

Everyone clapped, including Arsenal, who couldn't keep her eyes off of him. He looked across the crowd and his eyes met Arsenal's. He looked at her for a long time. He was pulled off the stage by one of his band-mates.

" Who was that?" Sherrie asked as the crowd departed.

" I don't know, but he was cute," Arsenal said.

" I think you have a crush," Sherrie sang.

" Maybe." I felt my cheeks go red.

" Is that Arsenal Jackson?" someone yelled.

" Sherrie! I thought the glasses would work!" I whispered.

" They are! Shit!" she whispered back. Screams of joy began to sound, followed by people running back at them.

" SHIT!" Arsenal yelled. She grabbed Sherrie's hand and they ran off as fast as day. " Where are we going to hide?" Sherrie asked quickly.

" Didn't think of that," I said, shoulders beginning to sag slightly. I felt someone grab my upper-arm and pull Sherrie and I into a store. Many people went pelting past, and when they were gone, Sherrie sat down on a bench in the store.

" Thank you," I panted, out of breath. I looked up and saw the same boy that had been singing earlier.

" No problem. I'm guessing you're Arsenal Jackson and Sherrie?"

" Yes."

" I like your keyboarding and writing skills," he said to us.

" Thanks. What's your name?"

" Jon."

" Nice name." Sherrie stood up. " Well...I'm going to head back to the tour bus. I guess I'll see you later." She winked at me before running off. I turned to Jon who asked," Do you want to, I don't know, go to the record store with me?"

" Sure," I said with a smile. And so, Jon led the way out of the store and to the records.


	6. NOTE

Hello guys! I know, you may be wondering 'this story is completed; why is she posting something?'. Well, I'll give you an answer. I've recently joined a new site called 'Quotev'. I find it very interesting and more...descriptive than other writing sites. I'm sorry to say that I'll be leaving Fan fiction. Maybe forever, I don't know. Over the past few weeks, I've been posting my stories to Quotev. I will not be deleting my account , but it will be empty and admin-less. If you are wanting to read my stories on Quotev, my admin name is GeekDirectionerPotter .

I'm so happy I met some of you on here. Its been so great meeting most of you and I'm glad I joined this site. Its truly been amazing and a great time meeting some of you.

I love all of you guys so much and it kills me to leave you. I guess this is a final goodbye. Farewell, fellow fans.

~Geekdirectioner


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